Hello, I'm Michael, I am four years old and I am in my room under the bed whilst my father beats my mother with a jug cord. I am crying, I am afraid, and I have no one to turn to. Mum will soon be out cooking tea despite the agony I think she is in. Shhh, I hear Dad coming. He stops outside my bedroom and yells at me to come out. I am too afraid.
Hi, I'm Michael and I'm 9 years old. I have no friends, no one would come to my place anyway, they all know my Dad and are afraid of him too. Today he beat Mum again, so this time she ran out of the house with me, got into the car and we drove to her cousins place. Her cousin Hemi is a pro boxer and on seeing Mum he and his mate Matt got into their car, telling us to stay inside, and drove around to our place. A Little later they returned and I noticed blood on Hemi's knuckles. He told Mum we could safely go home. I don't know what I feared most, Dad not being there, or Dad being beaten up. When we got home, we lived a different life.
Hi I'm Michael, it's my 13th birthday and we got a surprise. Dad showed up for the first time in over 3 years and gave me a rugby ball (I hate rugby). He didn't go near Mum and frankly I didn't want him there. Then he offered to have me over to his new house and meet his girlfriend. I looked at Mum, and she thought it would be cool.
Hi I am Michael and I'm fifteen. I don't know who I am anymore. I get bullied at school for being a cry baby, I get beat up on the way home, and when I go to my dad's I see him giving Colleen the bash. I tried to stop him today and he turned on me and just stopped short of punching me in the head. I'm never going back.
Hi I'm Michael, today I went to a psychiatrist. Great 17th birthday present, given a diagnosis of DID and Anxiety/Depression. I'm on the ward after Mum had come. She said she has trouble understanding me anymore and can't seem to do anything about it. I swallow the pills and have started smoking. At first I found it hard to associate, but one girl, Mary, and a cool guy in his forties, The Shard he calls himself, have both taken me under their wing and I am chuffing away and feeling better. One day, the nurse asked if I wanted to see my father. I told her I never had one and this guy is an intruder. Shit, I stuck up for myself.
Hi, I'm Michael, I'm 28, and I haven't seen my family for years. I live in a boarding house for waifs and strays, druggies and ex cons. Life is sweet. My mind is screwed up still, no pills now except those happy pills that come along at this place. I do the occasional burg to foster my marijuana habit, and generally when I can afford to eat I rifle the bins outside Maccas and BK. I get by.
Hi I'm Michael and I'm a forty three year old criminal in prison for beating my girlfriend when she teased me for crying. I still have six years to go. Good news, I'm back on the Meds. Still smoking like a train, and boy do I miss the gunga!!
Hi I'm Michael. I'm about to be released from prison. Somehow Dad found out where Mum was living and killed her and then committed suicide. The probation officer told me. I felt sad about Mum. They said I could go to the funeral, but I told them I didn't want to. I shed a small tear for Mum. I guess I'm old enough now to have been able to confront the bastard, but so glad he did the deed himself.
Hi I'm Michael. During my fifties and sixties I was a lost sheep, and so hard to find a good bed to crawl under. Any footsteps brought back bad memories. Where did my life go and why? Am I alone in feeling this way?
omg that is so sad
ReplyDeleteVery sad and very true in some cases.
DeleteAwesome!! Guess Michael isn't living in NZ if he got over 6 years prison for beating up his girlfriend.
ReplyDeleteA male with DID too! Starting to think while Michael actually be anyone of the many we know.... he is in fact, no one!
We wish we don't have to have these things happen, but they do.
DeleteAn horrendous situation, loss of a person and a voice silenced for too long... A realit so many may never relate to, horrendous , thanks for sharing a story that needs to be told.
ReplyDeleteThank you for you truthful comments
DeleteFor some people, having parents is a hell on earth and there must be so many lost souls out there who had their lives taken away from them when they were babies. The world would be a far richer place if only parents loved their children and kept them safe from harm.
ReplyDeleteAgreed.
DeleteThis piece attracts and repulses--a penetrating look at the human condition.
ReplyDeleteTouching I think.
DeleteOMG Michael this is some very very good writing, I love the style you have used, of introducing yourself at different ages, I would love to met you, No you are not alone, I don't know how to express what I feel after reading this, keep writing Michael, please keep writing, add other ages in your life, try really hard to remember some small good times, no matter how small, even if it was just a timed you smoked some good weed with someone and listened to some music.
ReplyDeleteOr found almost a whole burger in the bin outside Macca's.
Whatever, Michael, whatever you write, for gosh sake keep writing, you have a talent, I could read a blog of what you have written alike above. I'm going to see if I can contact you, I live in Christchurch, but would love to meet you.
You are an awesome writter
Cheers Lynny
Hiya. This story is fictitious as is the character but he is an amalgam of many people I have known in the mental health journey so represents their tales. My name is Thane and I live in Palmerston North. Thanks for the kind words about my writing, I do try to be dramatic without being flowery.
ReplyDeleteHi Gunner Thane*cool name btw) I was actually talking about the style of the writing rather than they words themselves. I really like that introduction at various ages idea, I have thought about it ever since I read it yesterday, way's in improve the concept even more. I thought I recognized the picture, one that I had seen before online...
ReplyDeleteMany of us have similar or worse stories than Michael, unfortunately, but that style of writing really speaks to Me.
I used to live in Palmy until this time last year, I'd love to come back up, but money-wise its out of the question.
Shame I couldn't have met you while there, but being disabled, I stay in the house most of the time.
I had a book almost finished, and lost it when my hd fried a could of weeks ago, but when U start writing again, going to use the style this story is written in, with a little added in.
Mant thanks for writing this Gunner
No worries, and I hear ya about losing writing, have always backed my stuff off the PC just in case that happens.
ReplyDeleteMy email is thanew@vodafone.co.nz if you'd like to converse. I have a special Short Story that might interest you.
Thane
Very well written. Well done. Obviously Michael had a very difficult life, and unfortunately there are millions more people out there in this world who sadly endured this kind of childhood.
ReplyDeleteThe shame of it all is dysfunctional families. I suppose this has a Once Were Warriors feel to it.
Delete